Mighty Father, thank You for the gift of Your love and presence. Thank You Lord that Your mercies are new each day. Thank You for Your Amazing Grace and patience, correction and redirection. Thank You for Your consistency. Thank You Father that all that I am and am becoming is because of Who You are. Thank You for meeting me where I am every time and for lovingly leading me through it. I could never thank You enough for everything You have brought me through and continue to work in me. My life is Yours Lord. Have Your Way. Fill this space and use it all for Your Glory alone, I pray in Jesus Name, Amen.
Oh goodness, where do I begin ❤️🩹
First off, I hope you all had a lovely love month. I appreciate the fact that Black History Month falls in the month of February. There is unfortunately a lot of pain associated with being black in this world and not many people will acknowledge it or understand it. However, I am grateful that the love of Jesus will continue to heal this history and bring redemption to all of us. It’s not necessarily going to be an easy road, but there’s so much hope and I pray that more of us will continue to gain clarity and grow in grace. And I pray that those who have closed their hearts and minds to love (on different sides of this), will have a release and be open to growing in understanding and compassion as they need it. In Jesus Name, Amen.
I cannot believe that my last post was published on September 2021, that’s approximately 1.5 years. Seriously though, my absence has not been due to a lack of words, trust me, I had a lot I wanted to say and do. But instead, I knew in my heart that I needed to go into hibernation to sort out my emotions, my career path, changes in my relationships, and the incubation of another baby. The words that resonated in my heart was “Be still and know that I am God.” The past year has taken such a deep dive in growing in love, learning to slow down and listen carefully, becoming quicker to listen and slower to become angry. I’ve been learning to trust Him deeper and getting a greater appreciation for who I am, reevaluating my life, my history, where I was raised and how that influenced my personality and the kinds of things I would like to leave behind so I can grow. Words cannot give enough emphasis on how grateful I am to know and have Jesus in my life. The fact that He knows and loves me has been everything. This butterfly isn’t just learning who she is in Christ, she is also walking in that identity! I pray my life may be an altar of thanksgiving.
I was challenged by life. It was so hard at times. I have been so lonely, but through that process, God met me. He lovingly led me through, at times He literally carried me and other times He made me walk, but He never let go of my hand. I am so grateful for all the people He sent my way and the tools He used to remind me He was present because truthfully at one point, I struggled to reconcile my old self and the person I had become since I accepted Jesus. Through all the mess, there was so much goodness, love, peace, and grace. Selah!
To be honest, I have hated parts of the process. I was frustrated, disappointed, angry, and sad. I mourned the life I thought I deserved, the mistakes I made, the friendships I wished I had, and the family relationships I dreamed of. Through it all, I’ve been learning to trust that His vision for my life is better than the image I had pictured. I’ve been moved to surrender, and to continually do so. To surrender my doubt, fear, anxiety, desires to defend myself, thirst for vengeance, pain, feelings of betrayal or disappointment, and regret. I’ve learned that feelings are not a sin. I don’t have to shove them down and away, but should be aware of them, acknowledge where they are coming from and allow the Holy Spirit guide me on how to navigate them. Lord, I thank You for being my true friend. Thank You for all the practical help and support You’ve orchestrated for me. I love You.
I pray that as you read this you may be encouraged that He is not done with you yet, no matter what your life may look like right now. No matter how messy or impossible it may all seem. God loves you. He is for you. He is more than able. He is faithful to keep His promises that His plans for you are for good. I pray that Your heart may be comforted and strengthened right now. I pray that you may be overwhelmed with His love. And I pray that this week may bring you practical guidance and resources/tools to help you navigate the situations you are faced with. Amen in Jesus Name!